... eyes are the windows to the soul ...: January 2005

In Loving Memory...

Me Defined

She was beauty and grace
love defined in a way
one would least expect
she was sleek and sensuous
for all the ladies in my world
she was my definition
and I could ask for nothing more
When I cried she soothed without words
when I laughed she smiled coyly
and slunk away softly
because she knew
They always have this uncanny knack
of reading one's mind
And in her innocent eyes
she could see the world
and yet she was my world
she was patience. honesty. dedication.
personified beyond belief
and she was who I would become
the man to complete the healing of a broken heart
to leave his heart behind in his travels
for someone he loved beyond belief
in our hearts
I am her and she is me
and because of that she will always be
by my side.

S. Lau, January 2005.

Dedicated in loving memory of Misa, a cherished member of the Andersen household for 18 years. May you find eternal happiness.

Understand

Until you've travelled the winding road
and you've felt the pain that I know day by day
and you can feel the distance cutting into your heart
and the emotional rollercoaster...
... is your ride to life every day
then perhaps you will only begin to understand.

Until you know the nights of silent tears of anguish
and days of despair and loneliness.
The moments where you're paralyzed because of life itself
the moments where you see
and you remember
and it hurts but yet it's a cherished memory...
then perhaps you will only begin to understand.

Until you know the years where you could only hope
where you didn't know what was around the corner
and you didn't know what time would bring
perhaps time and distance was too much
perhaps time and distance welded two hearts
together forever...
then perhaps you will only begin to understand.

until then....
give me the gift of silence
and let me be
because only I can deal with a hurt
that only I understand.

S. Lau, January 2005

Damned Wine

When you left
I cried until I had no tears to cry anymore.
When your memory lingered behind
I drank... until I forgot.
When you promised you would return
I heard nothing more except that promise
and the world for me in a moment stopped
Because you loved me
You would come home to me
Every day is a new day to bear
Every moment missed for now
to be made up later.
damned wine. gets to your head. but smooth.
salty with your tears but sweet with memories.
Memories of a time together
and we know we've made a love so strong
that it defies the sands of time
and maybe the distance keeps us apart
but in heart I have always been
by your side.

S. Lau, January 2005.

-dedicated to my Viking-

Love

Did you know it existed
even before it truly touched you
in a guise you knew
in a guise you didn't know
nor did you expect it coming
until it blindsided you?

And yet you knew that it would eventually
arrive. land. and never to depart wholly
the one existence that fills up your heart
you know why
and yet you don't really want to know why
you just want to feel the existence
of him and you together
in this brief moment stolen
him and I together.

It hurts and yet you welcome the pain.
It cuts.
It slices deep
but yet as it bites into your flesh
you welcome the blade
because it's the blade that kisses
the blade that heals
the blade that bleeds
and yet it purifies you

You can see it in their eyes
and once you've met you know
there's no denying
no taking back the instant acknowledgment
that it's there
behind his eyes
and eyes cannot lie...
... they are mirrors to thy soul.

It hurts, and yet it lifts you up
in a way you barely knew it to be
It's the phoenix from the fire
and as the two hearts meet
sealed together forever
in his arms you're finally at peace
but until then you wait
you wonder
but you believe that love is enough
to bring the man that is your world
your cornerstone of support
home to you.

S. Lau, January 2005.

- dedicated to my Viking -

Calgarians...

... if you happen to see a forest (dark) green '97 Pathfinder, possibly with the plates RZZ 118 (Alberta plates) and a single bug-shield on the front, please do this blogger a favor and notify Alberta/Calgary police. Much thanks.

Bloody punks. You think that if a keyring was dropped it would be returned instead of being used to steal a car, right?

And yet, I worry...

... so how do you cope when you know that halfway around the globe this is happening: http://edition.cnn.com/2005/WEATHER/01/08/europe.storm.ap/index.html
and your sweetheart is living in the middle of it??

Well, as long as he's still talking to you, then he's fine. Still, I wish he wasn't there and rather here instead.